


Memory in Ice

by AppleSoda



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Rekka no Ken | Fire Emblem: Blazing Sword
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, F/M, Family Feels, Fluff, Post-Canon, Sad Single Dad Eliwood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-07
Updated: 2018-08-13
Packaged: 2019-06-23 03:43:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15597534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AppleSoda/pseuds/AppleSoda
Summary: On a frigid evening, Eliwood and his young son Roy attend a wedding feast in Ilia. When the boy wanders, he finds himself alone in the mountains meeting someone that’s been waiting for him. For Eliwood, it means confronting a loss he thought he had sealed away





	1. A Thawed Memory

Roy rubbed his eyes, and opened them again to see the place he had wandered into. The dinner that he had just been fed in the village below was delicious, and everyone was happy from at Aunt Lyndis and Aunt Florina’s wedding that afternoon. But not him. He had waited long enough to try to get up and run again, and there was only so much time before people decided for him that he was to go to bed.

In secret, he was glad he didn’t have to sit still anymore, running off around the village after he had politely congratulated the brides. All day long, Rebecca had fussed over keeping his cape neat and his boots and hose free from dirt, but already they were caked in snow and a little mud. The little bouquet that he had brought to carry had been given to Lilina, his best friend, who carried the flowers with her throughout the night. For some reason, Uncle Hector wasn’t happy that he had shared the present. Maybe he never shared anything like that with Father. Roy wasn’t sure.

The problem now was that the hillside near the village was boring, but that he had gotten lost.He couldn’t read very well, but a sign down the path said that there was a shrine not too far away. Carefully, he sounded out the letters to make sure.

Shrines, thought Roy, had priests. And Priests were helpful and could point him back to where his father was. And they wouldn’t be mean giving him a place to take a nap, either.

He told himself he was brave and true as any knight of Pherae. With newfound resolve, the seven-year old marched down the short, rocky path through the hillsides and into the chilly cave, his gait steady and certainly not afraid of any monsters.

But as he neared the end of the path, he felt the chill of the winds outside turn into a temperature that was much nicer. Aunt Florina had said something about the mountains being home to pegasi, which looked friendly. Sadly, they didn’t seem to like boys like him very much.

The little cave was like nothing he had ever seen in Pherae, or in any place that his father had taken him to in the Lycian league. Its walls shone like a million stars, filled with crystals and icicles that he couldn’t tell apart. At the enter were a few stone slabs shaped like a little building.

As he approached, there was a familiar stirring in his chest that Roy hadn’t felt in a very long time. From what he could see, inside wasn’t a church at all, but a small table for offerings with a few pieces of fruit set out for whatever spirit dwelled in it. Aunt Florina had said that something made out of ice watched over the mountain- a real dragon that had lived there for a long time and protected everyone from danger. From the sound of it, it seemed like something he would want to make friends with, if it helped people and was strong. 

There was a block of ice inside the shrine that was bigger than any of of the mirrors in their castle. Its surface was polished star-bright and thicker than Uncle Hector’s armor, which always looked like even Roy’s best sword skills couldn’t cut through. Well, maybe if he tried hard enough. But he was tired today.

Looking up wondrously, Roy saw that was inside the crystal-bright ice that twitched. Once, when his father had taken him into town to look at a shop, Roy had pressed his hands to the window, leaving prints behind that a clerk got mad at him for smudging.

He did the same again, knowing that whatever it was, he had to get a closer look. But this time, the prints glowed blue. A marquess of Pherae wouldn’t be someone that cried easily. He steeled himself, backing warily away from the ice.

Still, the tears came as Roy pressed his hands to his face, trying to think about what it was that would make him cry. Onions. No, that wasn’t it— he didn’t eat those. Lizards— no, those made Lilina cry, but he liked anything that crawled around that much.

Seeing his father sad, perhaps. Roy never knew how what to say in those silences, especially when he asked about his mother. She had gone far away one day, and father never could say when she was coming back. 

It was as if something invisible had pressed a hand on his little chest and wrenched, as a powerful shockwave rattled the shrine and the cave, sending the sides of the shrine shaking violently. With a slight yelp, the boy leapt backwards as he watched icicles fall to the ground, shattering like glass. Letters crept up and down the block of ice that he couldn’t read, even if he had the time to figure out the proper spelling.

Panicking in a way that Sir Marcus would have thought unlike a future Marquess, Roy found himself crying out, feeling the hot tears sting his face as he felt the bite of the cold once more. He was tired, he was lost, and he was never going to find his father again.

As his eyelids got heavier, he could have sworn that there were wings and claws that emerged from the ice as it melted away. As Roy finally gave into his tiredness, he felt two slender arms, familiar from a very long time ago, catch him. He heard the soft rustle of pretty bells that jingled a little like music, even if they weren't playing songs at all.

Though his heart was heavy, Pherae’s young lion fell into slumber feeling safe and sound. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of the first time we see Eliwood in FE7 is when he rescues Ninian and carries her back in his arms. I thought it might be fun to play around with that image by having her rescue our boy


	2. A Memory Revisited

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eliwood toasts a friend, explores single fatherhood, and stumbles upon an unexpected reunion.

 

Ilia was a bitterly cold place, but every time Ninian mentioned the land of her birth, her eyes glanced off into the distance with a quiet, subdued fondness that she usually reserved for Nils.On one night many years ago, Eliwood had gotten into his head that scaling a peak within the harsh mountainous lands to search for her favorite flowers was a wise decision, encouraged on by a streak of stubbornness and a bit of goading from Hector. The journey was an ill-advised one, but he had never forgotten the smile that had broken onto her face at seing the pale blooms.

 

As he watched the quiet winter’s night darken and the strings of glass lights the villagers had hung up come to life, Eliwood cupped the side of his mulled wine and glanced upwards to the mountains. Then he anchored himself, shook off what he missed most in the world, and prepared to be the father that his young son needed that day.

 

Their most recent sojurn to Ilia had tested Eliwood down to his last working nerve. The newness of travel had worn off for Roy, and he had been growing faster than Eliwood could keep track of. As he watched his son run about as a ringleader of his playmates, Marquess Pherae looked to Hector. As children, his best friend had persuaded him to climb trees, fashion bows and arrows, and hide behind empty suits of armor in Ostia castle, scaring knights on their way to important meetings.

 

Roy was at a wild age, and Eliwood had known it personally when Rebecca looked ready to cry tears of gratitude when he volunteered to look after his son during the wedding trip. In the subsequent days afterwards, he had disagreed with the boy over food, how many layers to wear, bedtimes, and how Roy would be keeping up with his studies. The party itself was uneventful, but only temporarily.

 

Exhausted from making sure that no toys were scattered about and that Roy’s voice wasn’t echoing too loud within the village square where most of the wedding party had dispersed to. Eliwood prepared himself to sink into bed without a moment’s hesitation, his finery thoroughly rumpled from the seven-year old that had clambered on and off of him like a monkey he had seen climb about the body of a traveling bard.

 

“He’s shaving years off your life,” laughed Lyn, who walked over, nibbling a slice of Fiora’s homemade cake. Her dress of deep turquoise enbroidered with strips of Sacaean woven wool shimmered in the dim light. “Even if you’re not saying anything, I can tell that you’re worked up.”

 

“A knight must be prepared for siege battles, Lady Lyndis.” Eliwood replied drily. “But Roy and I, no matter what he’s howling about, were glad to attend your wedding.”

 

She laid a hand on his forearm, meeting his gaze. “It meant the world to Florina and I to see you here. You believed in us in Caelin, when no one else did did.” She took several steps back, facing the square, and her face brightened as her bride, a vision in white with her lilac hair pinned back by a crystal headpiece, bounded over. The pegasus knight, normally shy around men, almost collided with Eliwood. Her face was flushed, despite the warm cloak of feathers draped around her dress like a delicate but comfortable shawl. Florina’s eyes found Lyn’s as she nuzzled against the taller woman contently.

 

Knowing that his presence was slightly extraneous, he complimented both brides and thanked Florina once again for the invitation.

 

“You know, I…” She hesitated. “I had a conversation once with Lady Ninian about Ilia. She appeared to love these mountains as much as my sisters and I did.“

 

“I can see what there was to love.” Eliwood looked around them, watching neighbors cluster together and exchange stories, good ale, and laughter idespite weathering the harshest winters of Elibe. That was what happened when one had the communities that supported them. Ninian had only gotten the chance to share in it in bits and pieces, but had brought t to life the land where he now stood once again.

 

Roy was missing from his table when he returned, and Eliwood only saw Lilina, napping quietly at her seat with her hands folded beside her. Wil, Roy’s other close companion, was also asleep. Someone— Rebecca, likely, had draped thick blankets of wool and pegasus down over them.

 

His son had to be somewhere in the vicinity. As Pherae’s marquess walked the quiet street of the village, he found no sign of his energetic young son. His brow furrowed as he heard only the quiet steps of his own boots crunch into snow and saw only his own shadow cast by the lamplight into the empty residential areas. It seemed that all the village was out at the wedding feast, leaving no plausible place for young Roy to wander off to.

 

There was one place left to search, and he knew the route by heart. The trouble was that the time, distance, and emotions that separated Eliwood from the road into the hills beyond the village was more than a simple matter of the steps he needed to take. Draping a thick cloak over his wedding-feast finery, he found the path-marker and went on his way to the place where his late wife’s favorite token grew bountifully.

 

= = =

 

A fizzy joy had settled into Eliwood’s spirits at the begnning of the day, that fleeting feeling that he nonetheless was pressesd to enjoy at the sight of a close friend saying her wedding vows. Yet as he trudged towards the shrine, the cold and the passage of the night tore at feelings that he had kept control over.

 

It had been years since she had come and gone from his world, and it seemed that no amount of years he could be given would ever allow him to become whole after Ninian. He wanted her at his side to watch Roy wander about the castle, playacting the bold knight that Eliwood was certain that he would become. He wanted to see her glide across ballrooms across Lycia with unparalleled grace, knowing that she would offer her hand to his if she needed a partner. He wanted to take her to the deserts of Nabata to give her the time she needed to truly read into the history of the dragons from which she claimed heritage.

 

Eliwood was prepared to give her everything, but he had no means to give her more time.

 

The hills leading up to the shrine were easy, and as Eliwood traversed them, he saw small boot prints leading from the village past the battered sign and down to the small cavern. This must have been the dwelling-place of the mountain’s spirit— another dragon that was said to watch over the village in the bitterest of cold.

 

Taking a deep breath, he walked into the cave, and found that he was not alone.

 

The cave, covered in crystal and ice, held two figures in the center. One was his— their son— sound asleep. The other was the calm, serene form of the woman he had thought he would never see again, alive and well and holding onto Roy, gazing down at him with the garnet-red eyes that he had seen countless times— as an outcast, as a dancer, and as a wife.

 

He breathed her name in his lungs before he had even said a word, its sound a silent prayer on his lungs.

 

“You’re here,” was what Eliwood managed instead. He took the flower he had plucked from outside the cave, and held it up, as if she would disappear like a sickbed dream when the medicine took and the fever broke.

 

Her fingers brushed his as she took the blossom and tucked it behind her ear, just as she had done before their wedding and he had attempted the foolhardy journey the first time.

 

“I’ve missed you,” replied Ninian.


	3. A Memory Revised

Seemingly impossible second chances never came easily. Eliwood learned that particularly difficult lesson with an army at his command. There were days when opportunities would slip away like a startled fish darting away in a cold stream, and countless times when he was certain that the next fight would be their last. But battles were, at least in theory, within the realm of control of the warriors that fought them. Time and health and the costs that they would take were another matter entirely.

 

Ninian had always had the ability to bend the rules when he had least expected her to. She had defied the time it took for grant a knight and speed with the glow of a dancer’s ring and a swirl of her sash. She had chosen him and Elibe over the half-divine lifespan of a dragon’s child.

 

“Here, let me take him—”He saw Ninian’s grip over their son falter slightly, and walked over to gently retrieve Roy from her. She shook her head, and set him down gently on the soft cushions where she had been sitting before. Eliwood shed his outer cloak and tucked in their son, who burrowed into the dark blue velvet and fur like a woodland creature heading into hibernation.

 

All the questions that rattled around inside of him were silenced as Eliwood drew her to him, feeling the familiar faint but steady heartbeat that he had felt in times of bliss, in times of distress, and once in relief after he had committed a devastating mistake.

 

Heartbreak was always a feeling that Eliwood had cast aside as a fiction within the role of a knight that his father had trained him to become.He had set it aside once more when Roy needed him, during nights when the boy was sick or angry and needed a father more than he needed a nursemaid or steward to comfort him. Hector had chided him that this would make the boy weak. Eliwood quipped at his oldest friend, half-jesting, to test his sword arm in ten years to see just what Roy was made of. He knew just by sight that his son and Pherae’s scion would have no trouble making quick work of his foes.

 

Yet underneath the titles and the weight of keeping Pherae at peace and his son healthy and happy was a man that felt very much alone. He had feared the choice time and again when he had dreamed of her, wondering what would happen if he had the chance to hold her again, even if it meant giving up everything else.

 

But that was a selfish action, and Eliwood had decided to set aside selfishness and impulsiveness some time ago. Roy and Pherae needed someone strong.

 

He felt no such strength and false confidence when he pulled Ninian to him, brushing a kiss across her forehead, knowing that she watched him with an amused gaze.

 

“Such gallantness. Have we grown so far apart that I must refer to you as ‘Lord Eliwood’ again?”

 

“That would never happen,” Eliwood murmured, taking a strand of light blue hair between his fingers and brushing it back before he leaned in again “You’re impossible to grow apart from.” He committed those words to memory almost in prayer as their lips met and he forgot the chill of the cavern around them.

 

“I have something to tell you,” she said, once they had broken apart. There was color in Ninian’s cheeks,, but not, he thought, from the cold and a brightness in her eyes that only came out when she was around someone she truly trusted. “The waters of the springs here are what keep me here. But I…fear that I am not quite alive in the conventional sense, dearest.” She gently folded up the mantle over her shoulders and draped it over him, noticing that he shivered slightly after lending Roy his cloak. The fabric, though thin, was enough to seal away the cold through some unknown magic.

 

A selfish part of him wanted to bargain at what she had just said.

 

“What do you mean by that?” He found himself asking.

 

“The price for buying this time came at the price of occupying this shrine. Iliia is a sacred place for my people, and I had lived here for many years, looking over his village” She shook her head. “But I think I like this…watching over them, listening to their troubles and helping them when I wake.”

 

"Perhaps one day I will be able to join you again in Pherae, but I cannot leave this village." Ninian clutched at his hand. "Not for some time, I'm afraid."

 

It was a spirit that Eliwood had seen her fight with on the battlefield, lending strength to warriors that were dead to rights. What had been left unsaid was that she was unable to depart with them, or for him to fulfill any of the wondrous things that she deserved.

 

“I swore it,” the words came out of him one by one, like stones tumbling into a river without grace, rhyme or reason. “I swore that I would never love another, and I will honor that no matter how many days we have left together, Ninian.”

 

“This I know, dear.” He had missed how steadily her hands moved as she drew close and laid her fingers on his arm. They were cool to the touch, but not unpleasant. Nothing she did could do anything other than complete him, and he suddenly felt the years between when he had seen her last, sickly and pale, and whole and healthy again, slip away into the night.

 

“I have been made to doubt many things. But…your honesty proved to be different. My love for him has also never wavered.” She ruffled Roy’s hair as he continued to slumber, shifting slightly against her lap before snuggling closer to Ninian’s side. His small head, topped with Eliwood’s bright red hair, popped out of his makeshift blanket. “I would love to see him again, should he have the time to visit.”

 

“We’ll make the time,” Eliwood said quietly. “There will always be a place for you in his life. I’ll make sure of it, on my knight’s vow.”

 

Smiling, Ninian pressed the bundle of the most important thing in their lives back into his arms. As Eliwood departed, the colors of Ilia’s mountains that framed the seemingly abandoned shrine were bright, as colors swirled overhead, suggesting that the horizon had far more in store for him than he had thought. 

 

= = =

 

“Look, It’s snowing!” called Lyn, who pointed up at the sky as she relaxed into Florina’s arms at their banquet table, resting after the last dance of their wedding feast. Both brides were finely clothed in dresses decorated by beads on Lyn’s part and pegasus feathers on Florina’s. The wedding feast was well underway, with the merry band in good spirits after a delicious home-cooked meal that the village had assembled together. Fiora’s handiwork was present, and Farina had broken into a private cache of wines she had squirreled away for years..

 

“He’s found the boy!” Hector bellowed, well into several drinks and gesturing just as loudly as Eliwood headed back down the path. At his side was a drowsy Lilina, whose eyes brightened at the sight of Roy, safe and sound.

 

Eliwood was tired, and responded by lifting two fingers to his lips and pointing at his sleeping son. Remembering his manners, though, he mouthed a silent thanks to the wedding party that was returning from the village after an unfruitful search for the heir to Pherae.

 

They heard a flutter of a pegasus’ wings overhead, suddenly but surely.As Eliwood looked overhead, he thought it to be a knight out on a very late patrol at an inopportune time, or some rogue pegasus knight that was sweeping down on the village. But then he saw the petals fall, mixing in with the snow. It wasn’t just any flower either, but the blooms that many years ago, he had ascended the mountains to find for the woman that had taken his heart.

 

His pulse sped up as he caught the barest glimpse of a snowy mantle and the fan of pale blue hair that fell over the rider’s shoulders. They all crowded around the center of the square, watching the petals fall from the mysterious woman. There was a hint of a smile and a maneuvering of the pegasus with a dive and a swooping motion so elegant, it looked like horse and knight danced across the sky, scattering petals in whirls and bursts of pale color.

 

Then, both horse and rider vanished, swooping off beyond the village and back into the mountains that were said to protect them. Eliwood watched her go, knowing that it was a promise at a new chance. Then, he turned back and returned to give Lyn and Florina his best wishes before seeing where his own love would take him. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bride Ninian's design is good, but I combined her pegasus with her regular outfit because it's very rude to go to another person's wedding wearing a wedding dress!

**Author's Note:**

> Everyone is wearing their cute Valentines alts in this fic. Roy's is a tiny version of his cupid outfit :) 
> 
> https://fireemblem.gamepress.gg/hero/roy-la


End file.
